Little Mascara

After reading the Yeti’s and the Broad’s musings on men and women respectively, some thoughts of my own on the subject popped into my head.

Now what I know about women could be inscribed on my forehead with room left over, so I won’t be pontificating on the fair sex. But I do know plenty about men – specifically the difference between men who like women, and men who don’t. So pay attention ladies, this will benefit you the most.

I’m not talking about sexual preference either, mind you. I’m talking about heterosexual men who don’t like women. Huh? What do I mean? It’s simple – there are plenty of strait guys out there who don’t like women. They may want, desire, fear, mistrust or need women. But they don’t like women. If you removed that whole pesky biological imperative to seek out members of the opposite sex, these men wouldn’t bother with women at all. To them, women aren’t really people, they’re some sort of ‘other’ – girlfriend, wife, trophy – whatever they’re needed for. The ever-delightful Mimi Smartypants described them in passing as “Golden-Tee-addicted, Budweiser-guzzling date rapists with seriously skewed ideas about money and success, and whose notion of 'treating you right' goes no further than roses, bubble baths, and teddy bears.”

Here’s the dirty little secret: men who genuinely like women want to be around women, even when you take the whole sex thing out of the equation. Not that there’s anything wrong with the sex thing; we here at Obscurorant are firmly in favor of The Sexy. But men who like women aren’t always about the sex thing. They like women just because, well, they’re women. Aesthetically pleasing? No doubt – but different (and therefore interesting) in other ways as well; they way they think, their outlooks on life, perspectives on situations - I could go on forever. Men and women are very different, and men who genuinely like women appreciate this… no treasure this difference. And actively seek it out. And enjoy it. And when the sex thing does enter the picture, they appreciate the whole woman as a person, not just as some cutout that fulfills a need for sex or arm-candy or whatever.

And yeah, I consider myself in the men who like women category. Sure I’ve done my time in all male settings. And I still do enjoy time spent out with ‘the boys’ spitting, scratching, cussing, beer drinking and doing other man things. But the age of thirty-three – I frankly prefer the company of women. It’s no accident that of my five closest friends, three are women. Of course these are women who like men – because the same dichotomy occurs with strait women as well. (But I’ll let a woman to comment on that related phenomenon.)

When I reread the above, it all seemed rather banal and thunderingly obvious. But then I think of all the women I’ve known, mistreated by men in their lives, and making excuses for the culprits. And I think of the men I’ve known in the same situation. So I guess it’s not so obvious after all.