Three Shalt Be The Number

And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."

After beating the Angels 10-7 last night, in a game that had something for everyone (including the seemingly obligatory scary they're-gonna-choke-it-moment), the Red Sox now rest three and half games back of the Yankees, three back in the loss column.

Because the Yankees lost night. By a score of 22-0.

Hahaha.

A-hahahahahaha!

Mwa-hahahahahahahahaha!

Phew. Excuse my while I wipe away tears of laughter and joy, but last night was the most enjoyable bit of scoreboard watching ever. At times I thought my sense of disbelief would rise up and choke up me, so complete was the Indian's rout of the Yanks.

Not that we should give the Yankees a ten count just yet. As the Big Fellah himself noted:

"Contrary to the beliefs of a lot of people in this region, the Yankees don't suck. Their shortstop has four rings, they probably have one of the best managers in sports. I don't expect them to fall down on the job. They were good enough to put 10 1/2 games between us. We're going to need some help to catch up. But if we stay focused ... and play the way we're playing, I think we're going to do all right."

So rather than get too far head of myself, I'll simply bask in last night's Red Sox victory.

The Big Fellah went for seven-plus innings, more than enough for his 17th win. One thing about Curt - he's almost as entertaining in the dugout as he is on the mound. I love the shots of him after he's come out of a game: tossing his head like a thoroughbred straining against the bit, waving his arms about, cussing - Schilling gets mad when doesn't go nine, even with a win in hand. Love that drive.

Manny knocks two out of Fenway. Manny for MVP. What else is there to say?

Bill 'Ole Grandad' Mueller swings a strong bat and displays some damn fine glove work. Of late I'm really digging the Laconic One. Maybe because he's showing some gray n' white hairs, like me. I can identify.

Dave Roberts... Dave Roberts!? Yes. Dave Roberts, he who was responsible for my 'who are these guys?' moment a la Butch n' Sundance. Dave Roberts (Dave Roberts!?) hit a three-run homer in the seventh, three runs that would mean the game for the Sox and I found myself asking who are these guys? Who is this team? They're certainly not the guys that inspired this and this and this. Those guys must've been impostors or pod people, body snatchers posing as the Olde Towne Team, because these guys are playing on a whole 'nother level. So the opposing team shuts down one of your big gun RBI men (the Ortizzle went 1-4 with no RBIs)? No problem - Dave Roberts (Dave Roberts!?) will step up and take care of business.

Regardless of how they do in the coming days, it is such a relief to be able to enjoy this team again to no longer suffer through lackadaisical ball and excruciating losses.. They're playing hard. Everyone's contributing - everyone's playing the hero. Everyone's having fun. Including me.

Dave Roberts!?