A Crisis
There are Chuckles in the vending machine. Chuckles!
Chuckles are horrid. Who in their right mind would stock a vending machine with Chuckles, or request that a vending machine be so stocked? Who in their right mind would purchase Chuckles? They taste like slightly mushy hockey pucks.
1. Chuckles. 'Nuff said.
2. Necco Wafers. Like stale Communion wafer. All the guilt, none of the taste.
3. Wax Lips. Think about this one. You're. Eating. Wax. Why not just try a scented candle? At least some of those smell like they'd taste good.
4. Pixy Stix. There is nothing actually wrong with Pixy Stix. Pixy Stix made this list simply because the act of consuming was the equivalent of mainlining sugar for children. Dire things resulted. Like stitches.
5. Boston Baked Beans. If you grew up in my family you probably had real baked beans not more than oh.. three or four times a week. So if you managed to get your grubby little monkey hands on some change to buy candy at the pharmacy, the last item you wanted was more fucking baked beans.
Chuckles are horrid. Who in their right mind would stock a vending machine with Chuckles, or request that a vending machine be so stocked? Who in their right mind would purchase Chuckles? They taste like slightly mushy hockey pucks.
The Silver Fox's Official List of Worst Candy Ever
1. Chuckles. 'Nuff said.
2. Necco Wafers. Like stale Communion wafer. All the guilt, none of the taste.
3. Wax Lips. Think about this one. You're. Eating. Wax. Why not just try a scented candle? At least some of those smell like they'd taste good.
4. Pixy Stix. There is nothing actually wrong with Pixy Stix. Pixy Stix made this list simply because the act of consuming was the equivalent of mainlining sugar for children. Dire things resulted. Like stitches.
5. Boston Baked Beans. If you grew up in my family you probably had real baked beans not more than oh.. three or four times a week. So if you managed to get your grubby little monkey hands on some change to buy candy at the pharmacy, the last item you wanted was more fucking baked beans.
<< Home